My other half put it rather more poetically:

These Foolish Things

With apologies to Marvell, Strachey and Link (whoever they are, they wrote at least one great song)

A cigarette that bears exotic traces,
Discarded clothing in unusual places,
The leather paddle's sting,
These foolish things
Remind me of you.

A sandwich eaten through polite exchanges,
A knowing look that hides behind the pages,
That's how the fun begins,
These foolish things
Remind me of you.

You bent, I caned
You captured me.
Now I've done that to you
I want to do it the next day too.

Your smooth cheeks reddening as the hairbrush smarted,
Your having second thoughts on what you started,
The glow your spanking brings
These foolish things
Remind me of you.

It's nice to have reminders of our times together when we're apart. I'm definitely not the housework-type, so tidying's not my strong point, but leaving some stuff around just enables me to smile to myself as I pass. A casually left cane or shoe, a discarded stocking or basque on a chair and I'm back reliving our time together.

The last-but-one time we met was very intense and a pair of stockings, suspender belt, knickers and skirt carefully arranged over a cane on the laundry hamper just make me smile when I go to bed and get up. We've met since then, but were more in the mood for working on the house and sleepy cuddles. Meanwhile my little pile of naughtiness reminds me of pleasures received and to come...

Hi, hope you don't mind me popping in here A wonderful discussion and you both have really valid views. Suspenders are just simply sexy and look great to men and women. I am not sure how you quantify internalised oppression - would you say this is the same as 'fear' of their inner fantasies, which is how I see it??? There are many women (and men) who want to partake in spanking and other play but are too fearful of speaking out/asking partner to explore etc...now if they just communicate and play they could enjoy themselves much more.

DD

Where to start...My personal fear of Internalised Oppression (IO) was that I had been subject to so many oppressive images and idea that they had 'contaminated' my ideas of sexuality and erotica. As someone born in the fifties my received images were 'man-made'rather than female centred. And accepting others' ideas on what is erotic and what is masculine/feminine/natural order was problematic for many in the seventies I think. The idea of IO was one that had to be seriously cosidered in many contexts. As a feminist the whole 'personal is political' is and was important to me.

The nature of this blog and my intent is not to provide analysis of such, but I wanted to say it is a lot more complex for me.

I think there are people who fear their fantasies for many reasons, but my concern over IO was genuine and it is one that troubles others as do related issues. I have had discussions with nice caring,people who cannot get their head around spanking and/or BDSM stuff without seeing it as oppresion in some form.

I saw something on TV a little while ago that raised issues for me. It was a black man wanting and getting racial abuse and degradation from a white woman. It made me uncomfortable. He may have IO. He may not. I don't know. And if he feels OK about himself, does it ultimately matter? Like I said - it's complicated...

And back to the frivolous...I am sure my idea of sexiness is based on stereotypes, and so I feel sexy in suspenders and highheels. And knowing they 'work' for my partner doubles the pleasure. I would however resent feeling pressurised to conform to someone else's definition of 'feminine' for everyday acceptability

My right to dress for comfort and practicality is important and makes the 'dressing up' more fun

I'm trying to achieve the ad equivalent of feeding mad cow remains to cows...

Thanks,Znethru(I think...!)
I was trying to think of unconnected words, but with a few 'suspect' ones. I think I was also rather influenced by 'I'm Sorry I haven't a Clue' as well...

I shall now see if your list gets more interesting ads than mine...
Anorak, A to Z of East Cheam, Banana sandwich, Return ticket (to East Cheam), Book - The History of the little known State of Boravia, £5 (all in 10 pence pieces), Ball of string, Pencil with rubber on the end.

Do you think I have a future?

Who knows? Luckily we are more than our ability to attract adverts...

Stillresponding to ads...

latest ads...

...Ads attracted by by my last posting - Sounds like an alternative poem or another mad posting. I wonder what happens if I just keep feeding the ads back to themselves...

...and fluffy bunnies, bed jackets, antidisestablishmentaranism,Sudoku, trifle, symposium, green wellies,celery, tridents, plenary, juniper, gusset, camera obscura, bessings, Cressida, and alarm clocks.
just thought I'd see what ads this might encourage....
on preview it was ads for blogs...

As said before I don't do 'punishment' stuff. Because i'm so nicemy Cariad can get a bit stuck if I ask him why he should want to do such a thing to me Of course it's because he's dying to spank me and I'm dying to have him spank me. Today I managed to distract him with stockings, boots, short skirt etc, etc when asking the question. But between us we came up with a few ideas, so I thought I'd make him a crib sheet

Reasons for spanking:
because he can
because he wants to
because there's an 'R' in the month
because it's _ _ _day
because he hasn't in the last hour
because he's there
because I'm there
because he needs the exercise
because I don't take him seriously enough
because I diss him in my blog
because he needs to focus
because he needs to relax
because it's a lovely day
because it's a miserable day
because he needs cheering up
because he is cheerful
because it seems like a good idea
because we have hours...
because we only have a few minutes
because he's been working so hard
because he can't concentrate to work
because it's a special ocassion
because I can't remember how to spell ocassion/occasion/occassion!
because I tease him about typos
just because...

Once again my Cariad gave me the giggles so I threatened to diss him in public again.

He broke a metre stick on me not as dramatic as it sounds, as it snapped at the end in his hand

As it happens it lost about three inches, so we reckon it's now a yardstick - And as we're both of an age to think imperially (in terms of measurements, not politics!)we think it's an acceptable adjustment

The stereotype of spankos and BDSMers(bondage, domination, sadism, submission, masochism) is that we act out our everyday selves or the opposite. While the High Court Judge who wants to be humiliated and whipped sometimes exist (and apparently Katherine the Great enjoyed the lash of the whip) I think it's more complex than that.

Certainly I've heard of (and read) spankees and subs who enjoy letting go of responsibility. I wonder if this escape is more a reaction of subs than spankees. As my fantasies started when I was a powerless child, the idea of being spanked as an escape from my everyday life doesn't make sense for my particular case, but - as I keep saying - we're all different...

There is a stereotype of the ineffectual person who enjoys being dominant in BDSM and I think they may exist, but I suspect not in any more great numbers than the subby High Court Judge types.

There is this idea too about peole who are dominant in everyday life and are so 'naturally dominant' that they take this role in BDSM/spanking as well. I think some are charismatic and some are bullies or power abusers - And there are also charismatic and/or bullying subs/spankees as well.

Having said all that I am intrigued by the amount of people in the caring professions who are into spanking or BDSM. It may be those in caring professions are more open about things than say for example accountants or architects - but I do find it intriguing.

Thanks for taking the trouble to answer my posting. If you are like me there is of course a massive logical flaw in the idea of something like spanking which is meant to be a deterrant to 'naughty' behaviour also being something that you drop dead with desire for.

I think timsuzi's comment sums up a central dilemma for some spankees. I've read stuff about punishment spanking where 'real' punishment is made different and is seen as genuine punishment by the couple. Those on receiving end talk of feeling bad at letting down their partner and seem to dislike experience. Whether they get something else out of it, would be known to them.

I think for some, roleplaying to feel the fear and dread but to eroticise at the same time or later is their approach to this issue.

The dilemma for me becomes what I see as the erotic ambivalence of spanking.

Mild spanking is painfree or barely painful and is straightforwardly erotic - another sensation and experience that works for me in the way that ear-nibbling, toe-sucking, nape-stroking and/or breast caressing may work for some or other of us. Mild spanking is then a straightforward erotic practice.

Now although I don't have punishment spankings I have fantasised about such and the ideas run deep. And my desire for painful spankings are erotic. For them to be truly erotic and at another level to mild spankings they have to be fierce enough to cause me ambivalence. I find I want to be spanked, but part of me has to fear the pain for the ultimate eroticism. although I am anything but subservient in the rest of my life I love and need my partner to be in charge of the spanking when it is happening. this move into submission is part of the eroticism. Although I can stop it at any time should there be a problem, my partner is in charge.

I've written in more detail on my website if anyone wants more detail (link on profile page). if you have any questions please ask.

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

It gets worse...
I think I might have an identity crisis....

What Classic Movie Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

I just did this based on link from Autified's blog - I'm not convinced....

Whoops! Just reread last entry and spotted typo which so amused me it's staying. Subs can be bats, but I meant brats....

I thought I'd respond to timsuzi's question as a blog entry. It is a little hard to explain, and I've said some bits before, but I'll do my best.

My observation of Spanko World (don't get excited - as far as I know it doesn't exist as such - just my observations of those who are into spanking) is those who receive tend to be submissive, role-players, 24/7 and/or brats in various combinations.

Submissives presumably get punished for real and perceived offences or because their Dom/me wishes to do so.

Role-players 'become' naughty children, employees, 50s housewives or whatever and are spanked by their authoritative counterparts.

Some people are '24/7' and in a Dom/me/sub relationship all the time so may be punished according to the rules of their relationships.

Brats tend to be cheeky and get punished for it. I've not visited spanko chatrooms, but I understand there is lots of bratty behaviour such as cushion-throwing, use of water pistols and tying shoelaces together. I think it's more extreme in cyber, but brats swap anecdotes of brattiness. I've also seen a brat turn her partner's cigarettes upside down in the packet, spill water over him and relish such behaviour. I think subs can be bats sometimes, but they tend to be more respectful, but everyone obviously does their own thing.

So where do I fit in? My fantasies have tended to be of the cliché-ridden 'feisty woman getting her "come-uppance"' type. My true nature and politics make that abhorrent in reality. My hoped-for future was of pared-down brattiness where I would tease my partner, get threatened with spanking, carry on teasing and get spanked for it. My story ‘Provocation’ (in articles section of my website http://suzeemoon.friendpages.com/ ) illustrates this.

I thought this would happen when I found my partner, but it is somehow more integrated. Sometimes I tease him and wind him up to a point we both actually get the giggles, but I get my ‘come-uppance’. Sometimes it is just part of the shared eroticism. Sometimes I am compliant; sometimes I resist depending on mood. My non-fantasy writing on my website (link above) gives some more idea of what I’ve tried to summarise here.

Hope that answers timsuzi’s question. If anyone would like to know more – Please ask!

Apppaerently NC has written a screenplay for an Australian Western film. It sounds quite good. The R4 presenter was asking him about biblical influences and mentioned a few things in film, including a whipping. He said it wasn't planned and they joked about his inner choir boy (or some such concept)coming through. He agreed and he added something like "especially the whipping"!

I was just trying to be helpful....He was struggling with his toolbox, a pile of papers and a bag. It made more sense to use the shoulder strap of bag than the handle... It wasn't my fault that despite having a lovely time together somehow there hadn't been time or opportunity to spank me...Like I said I was only trying to be helpful...

I was chatting in pub with my 'nilla friend G and mentioned an unnamed acquaintance who was had been intrigued by my 'revelations' and started thinking about spanking stuff to the concern of his fiancee. I reassured G that it wasn't threatening as he was fantasising being on the receiving end rather than delivery. G wondered if that was less scary - a male showing so-called submissive tendencies could feel threatening if one has stereotyped views on gender roles. I realise that Dommes and male subs may have problems with assumptions, but hadn't thought about it quite in that way... It has set me thinking. In a non-kinky relationship I do wonder which hankering would be more disturbing...

I think so - Or perhaps it's just the way we do it...
Like other sex it can be terribly serious, terribly funny (never terrible so far!) or anything in between.

Today I just got the giggles. He actually slipped with the cane and caught me with a nasty stripe across my thigh. In fairness he did apologise, but then declared it didn't count and I got an extra one! I called him a very rude name and then got the giggles despite it hurting so much. I stated my intention to 'diss him in my blog' and was told I'd be sorry because he'd read it But by then we were both laughing - I still got my full quota though, and he didn't make any more mistakes...

...and happened across 'Super Nanny' - honest! And later I chose to watch Nick Broomfield's film 'Fetish'.

Now those of you who've read earlier entries or visited my website will know I'm a spankee rather than a submissive and I don't do roleplay stuff, but of course I know of a lot of people who do!

For those who are submissive and who do roleplay being told off, made to stand in corner, confess naughtiness is all part of the buzz, whether erotic or other - see elsewhere for this debate... Super Nanny amused me enormously and I can imagine many naughty girls and boys of mature years enjoying watching her being all stern which caused me further amusement. Then I wondered if we're going to see a new wave of subs being sent to the reflection room or sat on the naughty step or whatever...

OK...I saw Revruth's wordcloud and link to site is:
http://www.snapshirts.com/
Cheers!
Suzee
xx

Nudity?!
...So there I was in the lovely cultural city of Liverpool and skulking in McDonald's! Why? because the £180 a night Adelphi doesn't yet have internet access for those without own laptops and the Awful clown Ronnie does....

And the nudity?
Aaaaaahhhh.....I was coming to that....

Being anxious to write to my Cariad during a break at my conference I was pointed in direction of the bright yellow arches. I bought an hour's worth of surftime to be sure not to get cut off in full flow. Having written my billet doux I thought I'd check my blog and access was denied on grounds of nudity!!!

Well, ther's no nudity here so it must be some of you lot! I just hope you're feeling guilty!

People who are too busy for the Archers, reading, the soaps, holidays, smelling the flowers, cooking, kinky sex, the Internet, blogging, whatever are not morally superior - They just have different priorities - So why are they so smug about it?!