Once one has a cyber forum, it is difficult not to pronounce on everything under the sun and counter everybody else's pronouncements with a or a

I used to hang around a spanking site and like many sites/communities there was a section for off-topic stuff so politics, religion, the weather, parsnip-buttering etc were all fair game. I found it difficult not to comment on stuff, especially when I had strong opinions on certain topics. And of course a site I joined for fun, community and some quick thrills became a place of earnest debate at times.

Like several others I became a blogger as result of radio 4 play on subject and I've loved it! I enjoy the control and idea that it's my space. That said - I've only removed remarks that are a link to other sites I don't wish to publicise. I guess those who hate feminist, pinko spankees just vote with their feet - it's what I do. I have tried engaging with those of opposite convictions both seriously and flippantly and either wasted my time or got attacked, so I tend not to comment on blogs with which I have no commonality.

I have however enjoyed discussions here with people who have different views or do not understand my take on something. People like Varshkale and Blighty have given me pause for thought and I welcome chance to think more widely about things.

I recently started a thread on R4's Woman's Hour noticeboard because I have genuine issues around my 'fetish' and domestic violence which I've explored here at various times. A feature on domestic violence in Zambia and the concept that being beaten was a 'sign of love' was the trigger. What was missing for me was an acknowledgement that such thoughts exist in the West and was indeed fetishised and romanticised in films and TV throughout the fifties and sixties.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/mbradio4/F2766779?thread=4109520
The interesting dialogue I'd hoped for turned into a strange free-for-all and I was reminded of how little control one has of a thread on a public noticeboard.I've since commented on my thoughts on the noticeboard and that too has now got it's own life
http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/mbradio4/F2766779?thread=4271801
...and of course those that remind me of my ability to vote with me feet and stay out the kitchen if I'm not heat-proof and other mangled metaphors are quite right. Just a shame that a place which appears right for certain discussions doesn't suit me.I was however delighted to be directed to what feels to me like a woman-friendly (not the same as anti-men!)board which I now visit with pleasure.
http://womanshours.proboards81.com/index.cgi

As said - I love the control of my own blog and I also like the 'community' element of having got to know some of you via your blogs and exchanged comments - a lovely bonus. It's nice also to have a site where people simply start a thread because they feel strongly about something or wonder what thoughts others have on a subject.

And of course the challenge and temptation for myself and others is feeling drawn to comment on all sorts of things. I joked on Radio 4's PM Blog (See! I'm turning into a cyber-slut!)about their award for ineractivity and wondered what was wrong at just shouting at the radio. Of course I and others write meaningless, boring stuff sometimes, but it is great to be able to do so.
Those that feel this cyber-world of ours is dumbing down, may have a point, but we can all pick through and find stuff of interest. I like having my cyber-world as well as the rest of my life.

For me the challenge is deciding when I want or need to pronounce on something and when it is best to scream at the radio!