Nice to hear from Blighty with questions to explore

Hi Suzee,
This is a bit random, but why do you never get bored with Spanko? Maybe you do? Or have other less prominent erotic diversions?

The reason I ask is because a fetish isnt something fixed, in the way that sexual orientation is.

Of course, the two statements contained in the preceding paragraph may have widespread cultural acceptance, they remain nonetheless unproven. But devil's advocate and all that, for the purposes of the question I pose.

I don't get bored of the spanking thing, because it seems to be an intrinsic part of my sexuality and as endlessly fascinating and enjoyable as any other sex act - which is what it is to me. As said before/elsewhere - others see it as emotional or sensual rather than sexual, but for me it is sexual. Of course, with time one's interest peaks and wanes according to mood, age, circumstances etc, but like all good sex is definitely still enjoyable.

I would challenge claim that fetish is not fixed in way hetero/homosexuality is. My view of both is continuum of 'fixed', take it or leave it, 'possibly', 'just for fun/variation' and 'No way!'

I know people who are 100% gay and it appears that they could not be anything else like very camp gay men and 'butch' lesbians, but they are not exactly the gay majority. I also believe that many seem naturally bi-sexual, while others seem just adventurous and open to new experiences. My view of orientation as with fetish, is that there is a broad church.

And that's how I see fetish stuff. I suspect I personally had some level of predisposition that got 'triggered' somehow. Like gay people who always 'knew' they were gay, I was fascinated by spanking from childhood, despite lack of experience or incident. And early fascination was not obviously sexual for me, as I did not have the concepts.

And of course we humans can intentionally or unintentionally 'fix' sexual responses. If we find an idea pleasurable and give ourselves further pleasure thinking about it, we reinforce the pleasure principle.

Personally, I did not 'do' solo sexual pleasure before my first sexual relationship at eighteen. But I loved thinking about spanking. And when I finally decided to experiment with self-pleasure, the only thing I could think to think about - or want to think about - was spanking!

My responses to stimulation are quite normal and I am very capable of ordinary sex and think it's delightful. Spanking gives me a whole other dimension to my sexuality and a source of 'brain' sex as well as physical sex.

Hope that makes sense!

If anyone has any questions, please feel free to ask.