This is something I've been pondering, following a discussion on a spanking site:
http://www.britishspanking.com/forums/showthread.php?t=45640
I see spanking as sexual, but not everybody into spanking does. Whether it is or isn't sexual for people, however, it is an urge. Some welcome it and some don't. Attitudes to whether it is a curse or enhancement are similar to feelings around sex - Some of us wish 'it' would go away and feel a sense of relief whan it does. Others enjoy the spark it gives us and the feeling of being alive.
I have been in a non-spanking relationship that became celibate. My partner seemed to feel free of the 'itch' and quite happy to be 'past all that'. I didn't. I see the same would be true of spanking. If a couple are happy to no longer want sex and/or spanking in their lives that is great. Similarly where a couple feel more alive because of their particular 'urge' still being with them - that too is great. We are lucky to have enmeshed needs in a relationship. neither is better - just different.
Some people who are into spanking appear to choose to have a relationship with each other , but choose not to include spanking in the relationship - possibly because they see it as a more meaningful relationship.
For me a spankee finding soulmate who wants to spank her or him sounds like an amazing combination. While it is possible to have a 'purer' relationship by not choosing spanking and/or sex I don't see why one would, as both are just fabulous with the one you love. I think of it as a 'gestalt' effect - that somehow certain intimacies are wonderful and the whole relationship can be so much more than the sum of the parts. Walks in the wood, discussing books, watching films, being 'peaceful and easy', tenderness and laughter do not lose meaning when shared with someone who spanks me - quite te opposite.
I am genuinely intrigued by what may be gained by not 'indulging' in activities enjoyed by both - whether spanking, sex or something else. I can see a possible spiritual dimension, but I just don't get it.
timsuzi
Pro 
Well, and speaking from personal experience, the problem really arises when one partner considers that they are' beyond all that now' when the other doesn't.
I find the proposal that a life without sex or spanking is somehow a more spiritual one as utterly absurd. The pleasure taken in sex is part of what makes us human and by renouncing it we become less human as we would if we renounced the pleasure taken in food. It reminds me of the Orwell quote
"The essence of being human is that one does not seek perfection, that one is sometimes willing to commit sins for the sake of loyalty, that one does not push asceticism to the point where it makes friendly intercouse impossible, and that one is in the end prepared to be defeated and broken up by life, which is the inevitable price of fastening one's love upon other human individuals. No doubt alcohol,tobacco and so forth are things that a saint must avoid, but sainthood is also a thing that human beings must avoid.....
Many people genuinely do not wish to be saints, and it is probable that some who achieve or aspire to sainthood have never felt much temptation to be human beings."